Narrative Sample Two

Note: I'd like for y'all to view this as an essay example that could be edited or changed. The basic theme here is an interesting one - a student talking about the first times in her life that she recognized the existence of racism. Talking about topics like this can be very powerful. But what I want you to think about is how the essay would be different if she had chosen to focus on a single moment and describe her feelings and thoughts in detail, rather than providing us with a simple overview of a number of instances. THis is a good shell for an essay, but it needs more focus and detail.

“Oreo”, “White Girl”, were just some of the names that I was called. Ever since I can remember I’ve always been judge by other people, because of the way I talked and act. I grew up with white people and when I was really young I used to think that I was white. I went to a private school where I was one of four black kids in my class. My best friends were white I went to a predominately white church. I was emerged in this white culture. I did not understand that there was a difference between whites and blacks. My mom helped contribute to this by given me the name Kristen, she told me that she did not want me to be judged by my name. I even find that in my family because of the way I talk, I am mocked.
Years later I finally started to see that I am black. I never really experienced racism in my life, until one day I was sitting in my teacher’s class and she asked her young daughter do you want go home with Kristen and then she replied “ No, I don’t like brown people”. I understand that she was young, and she really did not understand what she was saying, but her words cut me deep. I was forced to see that racism exist. It also forced me realized that some whites feel that they are superior to blacks and other races. I would like to think that a little bit of grew up that day. I started to see things a lot different. The next year, I went to Central High school, and I can remember that there was not a lot of outward racism, but the races did stick to themselves, even though I bought into that, it still bothered me that there was a separation. I still was mocked by the way I talked, and it even got to the point where white people would call me “Oreo” and other things like that. I was thought of white black girl, I can remember sitting in my class and some random white guy told me that “you’re not like all the other black girls, you always keep your hair nice and you don’t do all those ‘styles’, you carry yourself very nice.” I did not really know how to take it, because it was a complement to me, but it was putting down other people. Throughout high school, I did not really change, I still talked and acted the way that I always had, but I was introduced to another side, and it felt good.